The High Places

Several summers ago, while at Tapawingo, we read the book, "Hinds' Feet On High Places," by Hannah Hurnard. That began an initial love for the book of Habakkuk, particularly 3:17-19:

Though the fig tree should not blossom and there be no fruit on the vines, though the yield of the olive should fail and the fields produce no food, though the flock should be cut off from the fold and there be no cattle in the stalls, yet I will exult in the LORD, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation. The LORD God is my strength, and He has made my feet like hinds' feet, and makes me walk on my high places.

Little did I know then, that those verses would be cemented on my heart in the coming years. At the beginning of a very difficult sophomore year in college, God used my basketball coach to write a card with those verses at the end. At that point it was a nice encouraging card, nothing more. But it wasn't until after this trying period, that I went back and realized God was stamping His fingerprints throughout - He was always undoubtedly near.
Shortly after beginning the year, several deaths, a move, an ailing family member, and pride left me internalizing pain. And in His grace, God had just the lesson for me, coming in the form of a class on the prophets. I had the privilege of learning and experiencing Habakkuk at the same time. Our professor taught us the context of the book and said, "If you learn nothing else, know that the three staples of Israelite well-being during this time were olive oil, livestock, and produce." Habakkuk knew that God was going to allow these to be stripped away and the entire book is him questioning God's intentions. He never does arrive at an answer. But he does come to a conclusion in verses 17-19.
"No matter how bad it gets. Even if all you hold dear, your three staples; even if life itself is stripped away, YET I will exult in the LORD." And this isn't without due cause...He goes on to say, "The Lord God IS my strength," and He has ALREADY proven faithful by guiding my steps and making my feet like the sure feet of a deer."
During this hard time, I recall crying with a friend and coming to a point where I had to make a decision. I said to her, "I don't know why all this is so HARD. But if this is what He wants for me, then I want it, because I love HIM." I know beyond a shadow of a doubt it was His past faithfulness that got me through that time.
But it doesn't stop there! In my weakness, God proved Himself. At Tapawingo that summer, I was asked to speak on suffering. Naturally, Habakkuk was the book of choice. I was going to share a little bit of my testimony at the end, but God knew His word does not return void and that was not needed in this case. Halfway through my talk (which cut it way short), I got to these verses and decided that verse 18 was a good one, "Yet I will exult in the LORD, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation." I was about to start speaking on my testimony but as I read this verse the first time I decided the audience needed to hear it again. And a third time...and at the end of the third time, I began to sob uncontrollably...Oh for them to understand the brevity of this! Oh, for me who was just beginning to understand the brevity of this! My pain came washing over me and I wanted to jump off that little island and sink to the bottom of the lake.
I went to bed at 7:30 or some early hour that night and didn't speak with anyone about the incident hoping that it was just a very bad dream. But at the end of the week, the director gently called me into her office and said, "Joy, I just want you to know that a little girl gave her life to Jesus because of those verses in Habakkuk." God had used me in my brokenness. And He had done so without my testimony - just His powerful word...and at that, with a book that is not typically considered an evangelism tool...more on that later.